According to one husband in today’s Lakewood Scoop, the answer is no. This gentleman paints a bleak financial picture for his family of 6. He makes $41,000 per year and his wife brings in $20,000. They pay about $15,000 per year in combined property and salary taxes.
This New Jersey family is reaching the end of a 24 month Medicaid health care extension, and now must find a new health insurance option. If his wife continues to work, he can purchase a $1,600 per month plan for the two of them, and the children can remain eligible for Medicaid. If his wife quits her job and he continues to make under $42,015, the entire family would receive Medicaid and Jersey Care for about $800 a year.
Although most of the replies to the article discuss the perils of getting stuck in the endless cycle of welfare dependence, and some advise the wife to get training for a higher paying position, one commenter agreed with decision to make less money in order to be eligible for public assistance:
“i made that chesbon years ago. dont forget all the other programs you are eligible for at 42k a year such as foodstamps etc. which could make up that $800 a month right there. thats besides WIC, HUD, earned income credits, HEAP, USF, child care,etc. It seems that unless your making over 100k a year you might as well make 40k with programs. But its sad that we have to live like this to be forced not to make $. You become stiffled for life and can never grow finacially. The whole system creates more poverty as it forces people not to work or to work less hours and rely on the govt. We need to petition the govt. to change the guidlines of these programs to give people an incentive to become financilly indepent.
We also need to get back our pride at being hard working, self supporting people. Some times even if it dosent make sense financially its worth our pride to know we are providing for our families ourselves and dont need any help.
So enjoy the free money while it helps you but be careful not to fall into the trap of being stuck on the govt. payroll which is hard to get out of. and maybe if you try on your own you might actually one day be making more money than the programs provide but you will never know until you take the plunge and try.”
Of course, those families who are paying for their own health insurance, plus funding state plans through their tax dollars, are probably not happy with those who consciously make the decision to stop working in order to receive Medicaid. This is the same decision that frum families must make regarding Jewish day school tuition. Is it fair for a family to decide that it’s not worth it for the wife to work, if her entire salary will be going to tuition, when the alternative is to receive the same amount in scholarship money and be a stay at home mom?
I think the question is answered for most families by how much money the husband is making. If he is making too much for the family to be eligible for government benefits, then the wife may have no choice but to work. However, if he is making a small enough salary for the family to qualify for public assistance, then the benefits (including day school scholarships) are often worth more than the money the wife is bringing home.
An amazing blog, Orthonomics, has been dealing with financial issues faced by the frum community for the past several years. One of her most popular posts, Heartwrenching Tuition Crisis, is one father’s cry of desperation over meeting the minimum tuition obligations at his children’s day schools. He talks about mounting credit card debt, and taking second mortgages, and falling behind in tuition obligations. While his wife went back to school to improve her earning potential, she had to take out school loans in order to do so, loans which become due upon graduation. How to pay back tuition to the days schools, plus the current year’s tuition, plus college loans, plus monthly bills? Is going to college and entering the workforce really worth it?
I can only speak of my own experience as a baalas teshuvah, and where I noticed an advantage over some of my frum from birth friends. I was on a college track the moment I entered high school, as my school was a college prep program. I went straight to college and when I became engaged during graduate school, my mother insisted that I get my degree and secure a job before getting married. Part of the reason she was so adamant about this was because my husband was in medical school, and I was going to be the main breadwinner for many years to come. However, my orthodox in-laws weren’t insistent on my parent’s conditions, and probably would have preferred that we had a shorter engagement time, even if I hadn’t graduated before the wedding.
Because I took full course loads in college, plus worked at internships along the way, I was able to graduate and find work expediently. However, knowing myself, there is no way I would have finished my coursework in 5 years and gone on to full time work had I been a wife and mother. It was only because I was single with no other obligations that I was able to focus and take the time needed outside the home to accomplish my goals.
Although there were many years where my small starting salary was barely enough to sustain us, I am grateful that my mother insisted I complete my college education before marriage. Of course, we are still paying back medical school loans, but our debt would be much higher if I hadn’t been working during my husband’s training.
Most women I know who married before or during college ended up taking longer to finish their degrees. The reasons for the delays were dropping courses or taking part time course loads to accommodate weddings, pregnancies, child care, etc. Some of them had husbands who were already gainfully employed, while others had husbands who were learning full time or still in school themselves. All of these women eventually graduated, but there were many lean years toward that end. During this time there is extreme vulnerability to debt accumulating due to lack of income.
Many men and women who don’t have concrete plans to attend college or vocational training programs before marriage, find the road to higher education a daunting journey. Once married, they no longer have the luxury of taking time off from work to complete their education, due to the crushing financial burdens of family life. I think that until the frum community makes a cultural shift to emphasize completing education and securing employment before marriage, we will continue to see families forced to decide between going to work or dependence upon public aid and day school scholarships.
